Having fun?

Ho ho ho ho.
Having fun girl?
Because I sure am didn't.
But still, you were just doing your 'assignments'.
Yeah, I get it.
No, really.
It's okay.




If you'd understand, it's not okay, okay?
Okay.
Yeah, I know.
You already told me you weren't there just to have fun.
I know, I know.
Then, get it done with.
I'm tired of all of this.
Too tired thinking about it, about you.
How hard I try to forget, but it seems too hard for me.
I'm just too tired about it (thinking).
Just incase you don't know, this is the way I send my messages.
This is how I do things in my life.
I'm not a direct face-to-face like you.
So, I hope you'd understand.
Bye bye bye bye bye bye.
No, seriously, bye.

Work,work,work

Hey guys.
So, today I'll be starting on my first day at work.
Gonna be awkward for a while but I'll get used to it in time.
I woke up pretty early today.
Ironed the clothes, drank some Nesvita and now still haven't bath yet.
How am I gonna do today?
I don't know a thing.
Shit.
I never did any jobs like this.
Infact, I never did any job at all.
So, this is what experience is right?
Right....
So, yeah.
I guess I could still blog, but not vlog.
I wish I could do both.
But, then again....
So, what else?
Oh yeah.
Thanks for not remembering me.
Just remember what day is gonna be this Sunday.
Okay? -not for you guys.-

If...

If you want me, come to me.
If you don't want me, let me go.
If you love me, find me.
If you hate me, ignore me.
If you miss me, contact me.
If you forget me, don't remember me.
If you lost, I'm your lead.
If you succeed, don't bother me.

I never had the chance.
I wish you would understand.
How much I love you.
Would you love me too?

Before it's too late,
I will regret.
My time won't be long,
And so does your's.
Before we die,
I'm dying to tell,
How much I love you.

This is not a poem.
But, my feelings.
Take it as anything you want.
But it will always be my feelings.

Today

Hey guys!!
So, today (Thursday) will be my final day as an unemployed person.
Tomorrow I'll be starting my job as a promoter at Parkson.
So, what I'm gonna do today?
I don't know.
I thought I'm gonna do a vlog today to tell that I won't be vlogging for a while because I can't bring my camera to work or it will be confiscated.
My working hours will be from 1 p.m to 10 p.m.
My camera won't work at night so I can't do anything.
So, I won't be blogging either.
Well, at daylights I won't. LoL.
So,what else?
Oh!
Our fight last night didn't turn out good.
Of course.
So, since she or me won't text, so I guess the phone has no reason to be turned on.
I'll be going to work without my phone.
Anything just come to me at Parkson okay?
So, as I expected, we won't be getting along soon enough.
But hey, that's what I get for being a dumbass right? yeah...
Since I won't contact her anymore, here's a song from me to her as an apology and to show how much I need her and love her.
Enjoy.

Here I go!
Scream my lungs out trying to get to you!
You are MY only ONE!

Where did the love go?

I'm just sad right now thinking back things we did together.
Times we've spent on.
Musics we shared.
Our anniversary music.
And no, I'm not trying to put those great things on her (because she always said that).
The love has gone day by day.
The thing is, I need attention like she used to give me back on the old days.
Now she's out with her friends and what do I have?
My motorcycle. What else?
Anyway, here's our song to you guys.
This song speaks for me.
It's all I ever wanted.
And this 3rd of July is our 9 months anniversary.
Just saying.
Probably she has forgotten about that.

I just did something stupid

Hey guuuuuyyzzzz!!
Over-excited a bit. heheh.
Anyway, I just got back from riding my bike just now.
Look at the time please. heheh.
Anyway, would you believe me if I say that I rode my bike, chased two Perodua Viva all the way from Sg Petani to Penang Island just to annoy my gf?
Guess what?
Believe it.
Yeap.
That proves me I'm crayzaayyyyy!!
Yup.
First I asked her where she's going.
She said she's going to Penang with her college buddies (two cars).
So then I asked again where's she and she said on the highway.
Guess what I said to her?
"See you there."
Hahah!
Guess what?
I really did!
Well, I only went to the Island and I turned back near my bro's apartment and stopped at Bagan Ajam for a while.
Then head straight back to home.
And now,as I'm writing this, I'm fighting with my gf about her going to Penang.
Yeah.
Anyway, if you're reading this honey, I just showed you how crazy in love I am with you.
I'd do anything to get to you.
I'd come for you, no one but you (Nickelback).
I just proved all that to you.
I don't need to do any metaphors anymore.

I've been thinking.....

Hey guys.
Quick update.
I just got a job at Parkson Taman Sejati (do come and see me) and I'll be starting on this Friday.
Friday~ Friday~ Gettin' on Friday~!
Okay, serious, serious.
I'll be working on the baby department and next month is their promotion month so, I'll be down below doing my job.
Okay, to the newly weds and expecting a baby soon, do come to me!
heheh

Anyway, one more thing, just to express myself.
Okay, eventhough I'm not working we rarely contact each other, guess we won't contacting each other next month.
See ya.

Penang trip and near death experience

Hey guys!
Sorry for the late update.
Yesterday, me and my buddy, Amer, went for a trip to Penang.
Yeah.
It all started went I was fast asleep.
I was woke up by my brother because he said somebody came to see me.
Of course when I just woke up means I didn't took a bath yet.
So, don't ask!
Anyway, he asked me, "Do you wanna go?" (in Malay of course).
I asked where to and he said, "Penang."
I was like, "hmmm........'
I told him I got no money but got enough just to fill up the gas.
So, he told me he only have that kind of money too.
So, I rushed back up and took a shower, brush my teeth, shave, wait, do I have to tell this?
Anyway, the journey started after we fill up our gas at Caltex Taman Sejati at around 11 a.m.
We arrived at Penang at....I don't know.
I didn't look at my watch.
So, we go around the island and I mean really around the island.
Got into a near death experience.
What happened was, I lost my concentration because another group of bikers we're waving at me causing me to look at them and not knowing there's a big chunk of divider and a massive cliff over it.
Besides the divider, there's some sands on the road near it and my rear wheel got caught in the sand and I lost my wheel causing it to slide left and right.
I managed to avoid getting the front tire into the sands.
Good thing the nearest car was about 50 meters from me and I had to stop on the oncoming lane after the incident, a bus came right after that.
Anyway, I'm safe and sound right now.
Talk about some major experience huh?
After a while, we stopped to get a drink.
We stopped at a road side restaurant.
I don't remember the name but it was cheap, highly recommend going there next time.
Then we stopped at a hill.
I don't know where it was but it has some b-e-a-utiful scenery.
Then, we headed straight to home.
Here's the video of the trip.
It's short, I know.
Should have made a longer one.

My type of girl

Hey guys.
Today, or tonight....well it's about 12.45 a.m now so it's today.
So, today I'm gonna tell you guys my favorite type of girl.
I always tell people about this but not in detail.
Now, it's all about DETAIL people! yarrgh!!

Okay, first, type of that I like, ok, I'm not gonna be that good guy that 'PRETENDS' to love solehah girls wearing scarf, covering their aurats and such in here okay?
I'm going straight to da pointaaahh!!

First, yeah I really do like those type of girls. They put a smile on my face when seeing them wearing it. Actually, the REAL of that type gives the smile. Hypocrite, not really. The only reason that I like this type of girls is because there's not much of them that is left on earth. Also, I think they're cute. That's all.

Second, their behavior. I like girl that is naughty in the mean time soft and cuddly. It's like 2 person in one body. I'm a very sensitive person so when I got mad words can't put me into calm state. Only action does. And it's a hug. I prefer hugs than words because...I don't know. I don't hug that much I guess. Also, I like to cuddle. Seriously. It makes me feel calm and more gentle to the girl. By naughty I don't mean sex kind of naughty. Naughty in a way that sometimes she always play with me, joking with me, pull some pranks (no evil pranks please) on me or with me, might do some rough things with me, or might ride a superbike by herself. It would be awesome!

Third, I like girls that comes to me and not me going to them. I know it sounds weird and kinda vain but, I like it like that. Not OBSESS! But, something else. I forgot the word already. I want her to come to me. When she cry, I don't have to open my arms to take her to my hugs, she just came to me and just be on my shoulder while I be a hero (well not really). Next, when she know I was nearby, she would quickly look for me and come to me eventhough we are not on the same floor.

Forth, I like simple girls. With these combinations, I think it's almost perfect. Do I have to explain what or how simple? Okay, I guess I have to. By simple I mean the things she did to me or herself. Like cooking, picking up clothes, fashion, make up (better without make up) and such. Why I like simple things? Because I hate complication. It just makes me crayyzeehhh!!

Okay, I have to stop for now.
I'll continue next time.

See ya.

Blank

What did you expect to see?
The tittle says blank.
Why did you read this anyway? :P

Nothing

I'm not trying to make any trouble.

but if you're reading this please scroll down.




















































I love you Intan Norhasyimah!

K, bye.

So what now?

Since she doesn't even respond to any of my blogs, so what now?
Maybe she didn't even read those posts.
So, what I gotta do now?
I'm tired of all this.
I'm tired because I don't have anyone anymore.
If you guys think that I'm just whining, fuck you.
You don't know what I'm going through.
You're not me.
So, don't judge me because I complain a lot.
I don't have anybody to let out my feelings to.

Update

Hey guys.
I think I never made any updates yet.
So, now I think I'm doing it now.
So, what happened to me for the past 6 months?
Well, nothing actually.
Been to interviews which I never really get.
Said goodbye to her when she off to university.
Not really.
Got a summon two months ago.
I still don't have the money to pay it.
Now I don't know what to do to get the money.
Now, I'm worried that my license would get suspended.
Some say that I can't renew my license unless I pay the summon.
But, if I pay the summon, I can't renew my license.
I'm in such a dilemma.
Besides that, I'm having a problem with my girlfriend.
We haven't talk since 3 days ago.
Why?
Because she don't want to go out with me because she had a flu that day.
Yeap.
I got pissed off because of that.
Silly right?
A guy like me is a pain in the ass.
Which makes me think, do I really deserve her?
Am I really her type?
Could I make this thing go back to the way it supposed to be?
I don't know.
What till she read this and let her decide.
Next, I've joined some group riding.
The first time was for a wedding escort.
That time I was riding the biggest,heaviest bike.
They all were riding FZ150i and some Ninja 250r and such.
Most of them are FZ150i tho.
Next was for a bbq held by one of the rider.
He rides a Kawasaki ER6N (or Ninja 650r in the USA).
Before that, we had some drinks at Tat Nasi Ayam and paid by the same guy.
I thank you Zam. A lot.
I think that's it because I got nothing happening to me.
All I did was wake up every day and online, take a ride, eat, play music, watch tv and that's it I guess.
So, until I got another cool things happening, I'll make another update later on.

Can't you understand me?

*note that this is not for you guys.

The reason I wrote all those things on my previous post is because I want you to understand me.
Do I need to make another damn metaphors or you just want me to tell you the truth?!
I'm not writing it for sympathy!
I'm not writing it to make you look good or bad!
I'm writing it so that you could understand!
Understand what I'm doing!
Understand what I feel!
I repeat, yes you have many friends and I don't.
That's why I fucking NEED you!
Because I have NOBODY else but YOU!
Can't you understand?!
With you ignoring me all these days you think it's making me happy?!
FUCK NO!
You have somebody else to talk to and I don't!
You got somebody else to go out with when I don't!
Because of that, you are the ONE that I was hoping to be all that!
Be my friend,my buddy,my hope,my companion and most of all my LOVER!
Because now that you're ignoring me, I lost all of those!
I'm sorry I'm being rude right now, but think about it.
If I say this to you right in front of you it would be really ugly.Seriously.
You never realize what YOU are for ME.
Who's ignoring who?
Ask yourself.

She VS Me

This is about what we got to ourselves.

She got many friends all around, I got few friends that's not even close to friend.
She have fun with them, I stay home and Facebooking.
She got her friends to go somewhere together, I went riding with myself.
She got things to do, I don't.
She got helps on things, I do it by myself.
She could have so much fun, while I sit down and watch tv.
She have allowance to spend on, while I have to ask from my mom and dad.
She could forget about me with her assignments and friends, when I, how would I do that?
She could call or text someone else for loneliness, while I don't because I don't have anybody but her.

Every thing with the word 'could' is a possibility.
It's not true all around but mine is.
And dear, if you're reading this, you don't know what I feel or what i've been through for you.

Seriously

I don't care anymore.

Losing my hope

Hey.
Sorry for not updating for a while.
It's just I've been busy thinking about what's happening to my life.
First thing is, my license is gonna end soon.
This Thursday to be exact.
But, I'm worried that my license would get suspended because of the summon that I got two months ago and where the HELL would I get the money to pay it?!
I mean, it's much.
Only Rm120.
But, it's just, I'm UNEMPLOYED!
Second, me and my gf are at it again.
For almost two days (yesterday only text for few sms), she didn't text me or contact me.
Okay, it seems like I'm putting the blame on her.
What really happened was that I asked her out.
I asked yesterday's evening and I planned to go to RnR Bagan Ajam, as we always go there.
Then she said she's having a fever.
Then I said okay and never replied ever since.
She doesn't seemed to be bothering with it either.
So, then I read her status in FB (Facebook), she said that she regrets coming home and wanted to go back to campus and she misses her friends.
I was like, "oh.........."
I don't know what she meant by that but I ,and I mean I, think that she regrets coming home because I did this to her.
So, yeah.
You get the point.

Painful pain

Hey guys!
What's up?
So, uh...I don't know why but my blog is getting negative and more negative.
It's not the content.
It's the things I say and feel.
Yet so, this post is gonna be filled with another negative feelings.
So, here it is.
Jeng jeng jeng~~~ting~~

So,today was a bad day.
Why?
Well, it started well for a while but it starts to turn around at around 3 p.m.
The morning I was busy with photo shooting for a wedding.
I got home and on my way home, I used the road where my girlfriend's house was supposed to be.
I noticed a car at her house and I'm guessing it's her friend's rental car.
Her friends from UITM.
Back home I called her to make sure and yes it was.
So, when she was on her way to CS (Central/Centre Square), I asked her could I join them and she said that her friends were many and they were going there with 2 cars.
(This is a long story and prepare to cut it short)
So, I asked "So there's no room for me?"
and she said "sorry eh".
I didn't replied since then.
Then i decided to go to CS because I wanted to buy pair of shoes for my exam this Monday.
Got there and when I was surveying the shoes, I stumbled with her friends.
I pretend to cough and they looked at me and surprised.
Then they called my gf.
And bla bla bla..(skipping)
Back home I was pretty pissed off for no reason.
Got back home and slept for a while.
Got back up and decides to go for a ride then suddenly my dad wants to use the bike and I got really pissed off.
Then I stayed for a while besides my house and there was a kitten came slowly to my feet.
Then I grabbed hime silently.
For a second I thought it was okay but then, all hell broke lose!
The kitty was chomping on my finger.
It wasn't biting!
It was chomping!
*cutting short*
Went to the water pipe to clean up the wound.
It was swelling really bad.
Then from behind, my dad came and asked what happened.
Then I yelled it was the kitty.
He got back inside the house.
Right after that, while trying to endure the pain, I burst into tears.
Those pain in my heart that was building up for a long time went all out right that time.
The pain of the kitten bite actually helps me cried alot harder.
The pain in my heart was really unbearable.
What's worst is that I don't have anyone to let it out to.
Even my gf didn't know what I feltin my heart.
She's too busy and don't even have the time for me.
When I was crying, I thought of her and it basically made my cry worst!
She wasn't there when I needed her.
When I'm sad or happy or even angry, she's not there to help me get through all these things.
She's just didn't fucking understand what I felt!

Un-appreciated?

Hey guys.
As the title said, that's what I'm feeling right now.
Why?
Maybe you're guessing it's about my girlfriend.
Yeap.
You guessed it right.
Righty-O.
Okay, lately, she's been busy.
Of course when getting into this 'University Life' we will get busier than ever.
But, the thing is, she doesn't have enough time for me?
I was like waiting for her 24/7.
Just now she had a 'ceramah' (I don't know what ceramah is in English), so she text me saying that she'll text me later.
So, I fell asleep waiting for her.
Now wide awake, about an hour later, I got text from her saying;
"Syg..sory letih sgt.tido dulu eh..*the rest private*(of course lol)"
So, I've been waiting for NOTHING?
OMG!
That is so awesome.......not!
That's not the first time okay?!
Before this she didn't text me at all and when at night she did.
But, for a few messages only.
Then, she off to bed.
I was like, okay, she's busy.
I didn't know her activities actually.
UNTIL, I read her blog just now.
Busy eh?
The first parts are busy but......
Then pizza?!
When I read it I was like, "WTF?! Why didn't she tell me?".
So, yeah, you got the point right?
If I don't love her, I would definitely would break up with her.
It's just I love her a lot and I'm feeling that she doesn't feels the same anymore.
So, you know what I feel right now eh?