Tuesday, October 22, 2013

It started from..... And now we're here. Part 2

Then, after she finally got her pay, she invited me to go to Bukit Merah with her along with her cousin and friends.

I told her that I had no money. She said it's okay, she'll use her own.

It was a heavy burden to let her use her money but I just agreed.

Skipping to the trip, we both went there by my bike and her cousin and friends rode along with a rented car.

It was a cool trip. I knew she was bored cause I heard she was singing behind me. Sometimes I joined her.

Bad news for us! Bukit Merah was closed that day for pool cleaning.

What do we do??? Well, plan has been changed. We turned back and head to Ulu Paip.

Bla bla bla... We had so much fun (but tiring) there. We head back home straight after.

Total hours of riding my bike : 8 FREAGIN' HOURS!

As I set foot infront of her house, I just straight away lay on the road!

My back pain ache so much and it was a relieve that I got to lay down on that road. LOL!

As time passed, it is time for her to go to university.

She got into UITM Merbok.

Me? Still being a bum.

For 6 months, we had gone through hell. Mostly her. (because I was such a stupid, pathetic fuck person)

Less talking. Less meeting. More argues. More jealousy (mostly me). But it was still fine.

I got a job at Parkson as a temporary promoter on July. Worked my ass off for a month.

I was a sick, crazy bastard back then. I used to chase her assignment groups on the highway. Yeaah!!

I used to get kicked out of UITM by the guard because I went there to meet her but the guard was such a jerk and kicked me out.

Sometimes I would go and pick her up and send her back home on weekends. That's the only time I could meet her.

Times has changed. We talk less and more less. She's busy. I know. It was my mistake for not understanding her situations.

Then I got my college letter from ILP. I will be signing up on 9th of January last year.

From that point on, everything turned upside down.

The first week of college was hell.

They took our phone for a week.

No calls, no text.

Even after we got our phone, my phone was busted. The screen was shattered (my fault). And I only remembered her number and my parents'.

Credits were none.

But if I got some, I will call her. And I did.

Times passed, we sometimes meet when I got back home on weekends. Bought her AC/DC shirt as a gift.
She's a HUGE fan of AC/DC.

But then.....

After a month of college, she's changed.

Less talk, less call. Even uninterested in our conversations.

One last phone call.

On that night, I had the guts to call her. At first, we talked but then, I suspected something was off.

I asked her straight away.

"Awak, Orang nak tanya awak. Awak ada orang lain ka?".

She resisted to answer.

Until persuasions were done, she finally talked.


"Berapa lama dah?"

"Dalam sebulan lebih" (it was blurish so this is what I guessed what she said)

She used to tell me that her ex hurt her feelings before.

She said "Macam pedang samurai cucuk kat hati"

And you know what? It was the exact thing I felt! LOL!


My love, my girl, my light, my path to happiness..... gone.... within words.

It has been more than a year now since that incident, I could still feel everything.

EVERYTHING is still fresh. Like it was last week, like yesterday, an hour ago, like it just happened.

I can't get it out of my mind.

My love for her is deep enough and I can't get it out.

I'm trapped in my own feelings for her.

Now, she's with her new Superman.

Jealous? Naaawwwww...


But what can I do?

Maybe karma?

I took her from someone else. Now somebody has done the same to me.

If you're reading this, yes, I still love you.

I know I can't do anything to get you back.

But the pain is too big for me to handle.

You cast me away like I'm nobody.

I hope, my questions will be answered,

You know what answers do I seek.



  1. Dear Hizman, as you reading this comment, i had read this on October 2015. It takes 11 months to take me here. I wish i can tell you the whole real story back then but i think it has been 3 years, we better stop bringing the past. I admit, those years were great, thank you. Hope you're having a great life. :)

  2. sorry, its October 2014 -_____________________-

    1. Dear Intan, I know what has done is done. But I wish the past is present. But I know it's too far to reach. Thanks for reading. I don't even know how you got here