Lost and lose

Sup' dudes and dudettes.

It's been one month now since I went to ILP Jitra and it's freaking me out.

It's not about the education that's freaking me out.

It's what happened to me that's freaking me out.

Last week, I lost my bike (CBR) to my own brother who is too selfish for himself.

I wanted to use the CBR last week and I text him the evening before I came home but he didn't reply.

At about 8.30 pm, when we (me and my friend, Daus) were already on the way, I text him to tell that we were on the way to pick the bike up.

By then he replied back.

He's not giving the bike.

I told him that I need to use it.

He didn't reply.

We arrived at his apartment and I didn't told him that we've arrived but I went for a search instead.

We searched for the bike first.

There wasn't any sign of the CBR.

By then I text him saying him I've arrived.

He didn't even reply.

He took the bike away!

Just because didn't want to give it to me!

He rode the bike to somewhere else just for not giving it to me!

FUCK THAT!

So, I've lost the bike (not literally) to him for his fucking selfish attitudes.

So, what did I lose?

I lost in the world of love.

I lost the one I love.

I am too weak, I am too stupid.

What happened?

Well, I found out (she told me actually) that my gf has somebody else.

Well, it's my fault for not taking good care of her.

Hearts can change right?

Her heart has been taken by someone else.

Yet, my heart is still for her.

I still don't understand why.

My mind is full of questions.

Why why why?

sigh....

I just need an answer.

I can't let her go just like that.

I love her with all my heart.

Eventhough my heart is broken, I still believe somewhere deep in her heart, she still loves me.

I hope so.....

I swore to her and myself that I will NEVER stop loving her and I will wait for her FOREVER.

I don't care if she's with the other guy but as long as I don't lose her, I'm glad. 

I LOVE YOU, INTAN NORHASYIMAH.